Fertility Update

Well, I know this is really personal but I figured that pretty much everyone knows that we are trying to get pregnant & that people are probably wondering what is going on. I figured it would be nice to have the support anyway....so here it is:

We've been trying since December. I was on Clomid for about 4 months but it didn't do anything...the doctors actually think it may have made me stop ovulating, which I didn't even know was possible. We went to a fertility specialist for a few months but stopped going because we felt like we were being pushed to do in-vitro. In July I was 9 days late & thought I was pregnant...then I started the day we left for a week-long trip to my sister's mission. Great timing, I know. We try to plan everything around my "time of the month" because I still have a few days where I am in a ton of pain and pretty much in bed because of it. I've been regular the whole time (other than July) but this month I am 15 days late & am still waiting for something to happen. I went to my ob/gyn's office and asked them to do a blood test to make sure that I'm not pregnant...the 3 tests I took at home over the past couple of weeks were negative. I got a call today saying that I am not pregnant.

It's really hard for me not to get my hopes up when I think that I could be. I'm trying to be patient. I really do know that Heavenly Father has a very specific plan for us & our future family & that timing is essential to that plan. Patience is definitely not one of my strongest virtues though! So today was a little bit of a downer. :( A funny side note though...my friend Erica knew that I was waiting to hear back from the doctor today. By late afternoon, she still hadn't heard back from me so she came over to check on me. I answered the door crying...not because I had heard back from the dr. yet, but because I was watching The Biggest Loser! She automatically thought I had heard back & was having a really hard time. I didn't even shed a tear when I ended up hearing back that my test was negative...yet I bawl my eyes out in The Biggest Loser. It's not just a little tear rolling down my face...no, it is that snot-dripping, bunching-up-of-the- face kind of crying. (Don't you love that description?)

I am also going back & forth on whether to change to a different ob/gyn and/or a different fertility doctor. If anyone has any recommendations I would love them! I feel like the drs. I have been going to are very competent, but I keep feeling like I need a change. I am looking for someone who I feel is really invested in me & my situation. Thanks for the help! Thanks too, for all of the support. I feel so blessed & feel like people are really rooting for us...and that feels so good.