SO Happy

I have been SO happy this past week. I'm doing things that I forgot my body could do. My life feels so normal. My days consist of playing with my little girl and trying to become the kind of wife and homemaker that I want to be. I LOVE this healthy new life of mine. I'm surrounded by people who love me, who have been right by my side through the tough times, and who I wholeheartedly enjoy the good times with. 

The way I function is so different than it used to be. Chronic pain just saps a person's soul. Now that I'm pain-free, I feel like MYSELF again. I never pictured feeling this good. I keep feeling better & better and have more energy as time goes on. It is an amazing thing to feel my body healing, and to see what that does for my life and my relationships.

I will never regret my decision to have a hysterectomy. It was the best thing I could have done for myself and my family. I am a new person! I am so, so thankful that I received such a clear answer to have this surgery. I know that even though it wasn't my first choice, it was necessary to get me to where I need to be in life. I am grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows me much better than I know myself & who knows what I need in my life.

P.S. I just realized that only a week ago, I was posting about Lincoln's schedule & how I was worried about having the energy to handle it. We are truly being blessed. His schedule really hasn't felt like a big deal at all, since his first few days away. What a tender mercy!

Ode To Duke

I wrote a post in honor of Daisy a few months ago. Here is my post devoted to Duke. 

Warning: You may be jealous that you don't have a dog as cool as this one. I feel bad for you. 

Another warning: I'm kind of in a weird mood. Hence, this extremely weird post about my dog. 

(You can blame this mood on the dance party I just had with my family. When I watch my dad do "the worm" over & over, I can't help but feel a little silly.)

DUKE...

I love the way you sit on the stairs, so deep in thought. It's inspiring. 

Even though you spend most of your day sleeping under the bed, I'm glad you decide to grace me with your presence once in awhile...even if it is just because you want something from me.

One of my favorite things on earth is your face. I LOVE it. It's one of my top 10 things that I can't live without. If I never saw that face again, I'm not quite sure what I would do. That's why I tell Lincoln at least once a week, "I'm in LOVE with Duke's face!"

I'm sorry that I thought you were a girl when we first got you. At least I still picked you as the dog I wanted to keep.

LONG LIVE DUKERS!!!

P.S. When we decided to get a dog, it was originally supposed to be one dog, not two. Linc's mom decided to send us two dogs to choose between. Lincoln & I gave ourselves one week to decide. All week, we told each other that we liked the girl dog better. We were glad it was such an easy decision for us. However, when we went to take the boy dog back, I realized I had made a mistake. I apparently didn't know how to tell a boy from a girl. (I'm blaming it on the fact that I didn't grow up in Snowflake. Not because anyone should be able to tell the difference.) We quickly realized that I had my heart set on keeping Duke & Lincoln had his heart set on keeping Daisy. So we kept both.

Life Without Lincoln

I'm not going to lie...life without Lincoln is pretty boring! I was totally depressed the first 2 days he was gone all day, but I snapped out of it pretty quickly & have actually enjoyed myself since then. :) Kylee & I play all day and go to Target almost daily. (I purposefully divide my grocery list into 3 or 4 trips instead of 1, so we have something fun to do.) I've met up with old friends and had play dates...something I never really did much of when I wasn't feeling well & when Lincoln was home part of the day. It's been really fun! Linc is glad that I can actually do the "hang out with other moms" thing. I think he was kind of worried about it for awhile. Whenever we are in a group, I tend to want to do whatever the guys are doing. I also don't make much of an effort to organize get-togethers...so it looks like there IS some hope for me after all!

We had all day Sunday to spend time together as a family. It was a great day! We went to my parents' for dinner. Aaron & Kylee had fun reading together. We are so glad that Aaron has decided to stay in AZ this semester!!! (And yes, Kylee likes to go topless these days. Actually, it is usually because she spills something down the front of her shirt. On this day, Grandpa fed her too many chocolate covered blueberries & they didn't all end up in her mouth. :) )

I hesitated posting this, but couldn't resist showing that Kylee has a little bit of Snowflake in her blood. That's right, give your 1-year-old a pocketknife to play with! (This is a fight I will never win.)

That's about it! Linc takes the MCAT in less than 2 weeks! Cross your fingers!!!

One Year Ago Today...

A year ago, it was still just Lincoln & I. He was going to school & working full-time & was hardly ever home. I was home all day by myself, feeling better than I had in awhile, trying to get back on my feet.

Picture taken August 7th, 2009, when Kylee was 10 days old.

Picture taken by Breonna (Kylee's birth mother), when Kylee was a few weeks old.

One year ago, at this time I was packing to go to California. Lincoln was asleep after working all night in the ER. We were going about our normal, everyday lives with no idea that our lives were about to change completely. I got the phone call at 11am that there was a 4 1/2-week-old girl who needed to be adopted...and that this girl's parents thought that Lincoln & I might be the ones to do it. 

They didn't know anything about us. They had never seen a picture of us. They had never known that we existed. We had never known that they existed. And we had no idea that this sweet little girl had been born into the world. 

My sister had taken them dinner and sat next to them in Sunday School. And the Lord took those little circumstances and turned them into something huge. 


"By small and simple things, are great things brought to pass."
-Alma 37:6

Winnie the Pooh

Remember Kylee's obsession with Winnie the Pooh? When she was 5 months old she would sit and watch Winnie the Pooh for as long as I allowed. That movie totally saved me when she was teething for the first time!

Her love for the movie (& characters) lessened for awhile...but now it is BACK! Once again, thank you Winnie the Pooh, Tigger & Piglet for helping me entertain this girl!

She loves to watch Winnie the Pooh while she eats...

And this is probably just a mom thing, but I LOVE that she does this with her feet when she is in her highchair. Her little piggies are my favorite!!!

P.S. Kylee's new tricks this week are shaking her head, saying "baby", & barking when I ask "What does the dog say?" No walking yet. :)

A Little Note...

A little note to those of you who I just invited to my blog...I honestly thought I had invited most of you already. And a few of you asked me for an invite almost a year ago. I could blame it on being on painkillers until 4 months ago, or on adopting a baby, or having two surgeries this year, or something like that...but the truth is, I'm just kind of lame & didn't go through all of my invites until this week. I really feel like a dork about it. Thanks for understanding. :)

Trading Places

Today was Lincoln's first day back at school. Two semesters ago, he had to drop two of his classes because we got Kylee, & Lincoln had to be at multiple meetings, hearings, visits, and appointments with me in order for her adoption to go through. With his current schedule, he couldn't do it...so he went to school part-time, while still working nights in the ER full-time. Then last semester he didn't take any classes, because I was having two surgeries, 4 months apart. During that time, he took care of both Kylee & I, changed jobs & has gotten 2 promotions since then, & has studied for the MCAT & prepared his application for medical school. Kylee & I put him back almost a year in school. Talk about sacrifice. He was 100% willing to put his goals on the back burner to take care of his family. Thinking about it brings me to tears.

Now it is time to trade places. Three days a week, Linc will be home for 7 hours to sleep...and that's it. Kylee & I probably won't even see him. Two days a week, we will see him for about an hour. The next few Saturdays, Lincoln will continue to take MCAT practice tests. Each test takes 4-6 hours. Sundays will be more relaxed, thank goodness. During this semester, we will also be preparing for a possible move to another country. There is A LOT that goes along with that. I've just barely started the process & it is a little overwhelming. Add to that, the uncertainty of where we will be in 4 months (moving to Mexico or still here in AZ) & we have a lot on our plate! 

I've been feeling the pressure. I'll most likely feel like a single mom most days & will be responsible for completely taking care of Kylee, walking the dogs 3-4 times a day (we don't have a backyard), and maintaining our home. I'm not going to lie, I'm still slowly building my energy back up since my hysterectomy (I told you it was a LONG recovery) & this new schedule is quite possibly going to take every single ounce of energy that I have. 

But I'll do it. Because I love Lincoln & I feel like he was MEANT TO BE A DOCTOR. I think about the way I saw him interact with patients in the hospital & how he is excelling at his job now (he was promoted to grossing & then was made the night lead over two departments) & I know this is what he is supposed to do. I told him that I would encourage him to apply to medical school for the next 10 years if he doesn't get in. I've never believed in somebody's abilities so much. He is pretty special! 

So I guess I should have the same faith in myself. And remember that I am MEANT TO BE A MOM. And that I am MEANT TO BE A WIFE. And hope that I make the decisions that I need to, in order to get our family to where we need to be. Lincoln has given every ounce of his energy to the cause. Now it's my turn.

Cranky Days

Kylee is getting 4 new teeth, one after the other, so the poor girl hasn't really felt like her happy self lately. I'm trying to remind myself that these cranky, clingy, short nap days won't last forever. Don't worry...even though she is fussy, she is still getting cuter by the day. And I can say that, because I had nothing to do with how cute she is! :) 

Linc sent me this picture while I was at Hobby Lobby the other day, with the caption "I really don't think she is going to sleep today!" Linc put Kylee down for a nap at my parents' house & apparently her Pack 'n Play was a little too close to her Aunt Megan's dresser. Kylee managed to pull ALL of this stuff into her Pack 'n Play while she was still inside of it. Scissors and all.

The boys took Kylee to run errands with them after that little episode & it didn't take long for her to fall asleep. She likes to sleep in style with her bright orange necklace, which she also discovered in Aunt Megan's room.

Lincoln has been taking MCAT practice tests & working on his application every chance he can get, so we haven't seen much of him lately. Tonight Lincoln, Kylee & I took a trip to the mall to spend time together. After I had a little cranky episode & decided to look at baby clothes by myself (I tried to switch from my hormone patch to the pill, because it is $40 cheaper each month...let's just say it was NOT successful!) I rejoined the family & we went to the pet store. Kylee either cries or gets super excited when we go in there...this time she liked it. :)

After about an hour she wanted to go home. So I hid in the corner of Sports Authority & fed her snacks until Daddy was done with his shopping.

Let's hope that in the near future our home will be filled with a non-teething baby & a non-hormonal wife! I'm sure Lincoln would appreciate it. :)

P.S. For the past few months, I've been having prayer with Kylee every night before she goes to bed. Well, tonight I started praying & she started screaming, because she knew she was going to have to go to bed! I hope she doesn't do that every time she hears someone pray now! :)

Random Pictures

Here are some completely random pictures from the past few weeks.

We met our friends Spencer & Miriam at IHOP on Kylee's birthday to have breakfast. She got her own birthday song with a bowl of ice cream all to herself. She wasn't a huge fan, so Mommy ate most of it. :)

Lincoln invited me on a date at 1am to watch the meteor shower in the grass by our condo. Yes, I know...so romantic. :)

Kylee likes to eat apples all by herself now. Oh, and her two new words/phrases are "Jesus" and "Hi Dad!".

I made headbands with my cousins Amy & Lindsey and have been stocking up on supplies to make more. This was the first one I made...and I wear it way too much. :)

Our dogs are as cute as ever. I like to cuddle with them while I'm waiting for Lincoln to get home at night. And yes, I cut my hair again. I promised Lincoln I would grow it out, but that didn't last very long!

The End

It Was Fun While It Lasted!

Shawn & Ashley are moving back to Utah tomorrow...so we had to say goodbye to them today. :(

Here are some things I will miss:
-Playing Rook
-Watching The Office, The Bachelorette & Boston Med
-Hearing Ashley's prison stories (she worked at the Florence prison for the summer)
-Bahama Bucks
-Swimming
-Bocce ball
-Shawn's voices & jokes :)
-Pigging out on desserts
-Doing crafts with Ashley
-Taking walks


Kylee will definitely miss all of the extra attention they give to her! Shawn is always taking her outside to look at the birds & airplanes and both Shawn & Ashley take her swimming with them every chance they get! I'll also miss having some extra babysitters around. :)

I'm guessing we won't ever be living a few miles away from each other again. It was fun while it lasted! Goodbye Shawn & Ashley! We'll miss you!

Another Try...

I feel terrible that I haven't updated Jackson's blog in almost a year. Since we got Kylee, I've been so focused on her and have neglected to continue telling Jackson's story. That's actually probably a good sign. I'm glad that I'm continuing to live my life. However, I want to always remember the details of what I've experienced with Jackson & how that has changed me as a person. With that being said, I'm going to give his blog another try.

I regularly receive emails from Gerber about what Kylee should be doing at her age. Well, somehow Jackson's information was still connected to my profile...I opened an email from Gerber tonight that was about what my child should be doing now that he is 3 years & 10 months old. (He would actually be 3 years & 11 months old, but they were going off of my due date.) I wasn't expecting the email & it made me miss my little boy...A LOT.

Sometimes all I want is to have Jackson here with us. I would give anything to be able to have a conversation with him. I want to see his curly hair & soak up his personality. I want it to feel like Kylee isn't an only child. I want to feel like I'm watching over & protecting & teaching BOTH of my children, not just one. 

Someday...

La Piazza al Forno

On Friday night my parents took our family to La Piazza al Forno in Glendale to celebrate my brother Aaron's birthday. I've mentioned before that my dad is obsessed with Food Network's show Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives, and is constantly trying places that have been featured on it. Well, this was another one of those places & it did NOT disappoint! I could dedicate paragraphs of this post to how much I loved the food, but I won't. :) Let me just say that the Pizza Bianca was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G and the stuffed shrimp was really good too! Add in a chocolate cannoli all to myself & I was in heaven! I have watched Buddy make cannolis multiple times on Cake Boss, and have always wanted to try one. Holy Cannoli, they are good!!!

(I have to mention that this girl made Poston's volleyball team last week. I'm sure proud of her! She is the only girl that made the team who hasn't played before. Way to go Meg!!!)

Kylee had a little too much to drink that night. :)

I'm so thankful for Aaron (see post below) & was glad that I got to celebrate his birthday with him!
(We missed you Lincoln!)

A Letter to the Birthday Boy

Dear Aaron,

I am so thankful that you were born. I love being your older sister. You always make me happy & are constantly teaching me that life is meant to be LIVED. You are your own person & aren't afraid to show it! I want to be more like you someday. You have the FUNNIEST sense of humor. You don't judge me. You love me completely for WHO I AM. You are sad when something doesn't go my way & you get so excited when something wonderful happens in my life. You are always looking out for me. You make me feel special. I love you with my WHOLE heart! Thank you for being such an amazing brother! Happy belated birthday. 

Love, Anj

Kylee's 1-Year Appointment

Kylee had her one-year well-check appointment yesterday. She has really grown up lately. She is definitely moving out of the "baby stage"! She is close to walking, but hasn't quite gotten the courage to do it all by herself yet...I'm sure she will soon!

Kylee has a new obsession with birds & airplanes. She also loves anything girly...she is constantly putting necklaces on herself and today she grabbed my mascara & started rubbing it on her face. I can't believe the things she is already picking up on! She is extremely observant...which means my days of watching 24 and Friends with her are slowly coming to an end!

Here's Kylee after we gave her macaroni & cheese for the first time...

Notice the piece of macaroni stuck to Kylee's nose & her hair sticking up in the back. She LOVES to rub her food in her hair, which makes for a fun cleanup after every meal! :)

Kylee also loves to CLIMB...

She loves to go to Target with me.
(Her favorite color is red, so Target is like heaven for her!)

Bath time is her FAVORITE! Sometimes we just stick her in there to give ourselves a few minutes to breathe. :)

Kylee has become great friends with the dogs lately, especially Daisy. She's a champ at talking & says Daisy's name constantly. She can say "Daisy Duke" too, and the other day said "Hi Daisy!" when Daisy jumped up on the couch beside her. She likes trying to eat the dogs' food too. When I take the dog food away from Kylee, she licks the crumbs off her hands as fast as she can, because she knows I am going to wash them off. It's so gross. :) She's such a crazy, silly, adorable little girl!

Here's her 1-year stats:
Height: 30 inches (73rd percentile)
Weight: 22lbs 2oz (63rd percentile)
Head: 18 1/4 inches (81st percentile)
I think her head is so big because of all of those new words she has learned lately! :)

P.S. I just read over this post...and it sounds like such a typical mom brag post. (MY baby can say so many words!) Oh well! The other day I thought about how cool it is to see little pairs of shoes laying around our house, and to have my purse full of Gerber snacks & toys. I'm so thankful to have a baby to brag about! :)

Messes, Kisses & Bullying

Lincoln's mom sent us these pictures that she took while we were in Snowflake & Pine last month.

When Grandma Hiatt spilled formula on the floor, Kylee immediately crawled over to it and started playing in it & licking the formula off her hands.

Kylee got some "cousin time" with Nixen at the cabin. She sure does love him! She becomes very concerned when she hears Nixen crying & starts "fake crying" (& sometimes "real crying") herself. :)

Giving Hugs...

And Kisses...

Kylee is VERY affectionate, but has a problem with being a little too affectionate! Last week she BIT our 7-year-old friend Emma. Kylee kept kissing Emma's cheek over & over, which was very cute at first...until the bite. I had to make my first phone call to another mom, telling her that my child hurt her child, and sent Emma home with a red mark on her cheek. It was not a proud moment for me. :)

A few hours later, I found Kylee under my parents' kitchen table with my cousin's 2-year-old daughter in a headlock. I am determined that Kylee NOT be a bully, so we are working on it! I honestly think her intentions are good...but she may love other kids just a little too much! :)

A Whole Lot of Nothing That Means Something

Last night I was feeling sorry for myself. You would think that I wouldn't have any reason to feel sorry for myself anymore, since my life is going so smoothly right now...but that is the adversary's way, I guess. Feeling a little like an old lady in this post-hysterectomy body of mine (it's true that it ages you) with nobody my age who can relate. Wondering why every time I become good friends with someone, they move away. Thinking that we have totally outgrown this little townhouse that we've lived in for the past 6 1/2 years (even more mentally than physically). Cursing myself for worrying more about my dog (Duke) than myself & trying to carry him across the creek at the cabin...& totally straining something where I'm still healing from my surgery & hurting ever since. Blah, Blah, Blah.

So I wrote an email to my dear friend who lives in Utah & that did the trick. She is amazing. I met her on a website for parents who have lost a child. We talk on the phone & hang out when I am in Utah & she is a gem. Sounds weird, but it's true. I can tell her anything. Then I decided even though it was midnight & Linc was just getting home from work, that I was going to watch tv & not think at all about what I wasn't getting done, or the fact that I needed to go to bed...so we watched Boston Med together until 1am & decided it's our new favorite show.

This morning I woke up to my baby talking in her crib. We played & laughed & ate & sang. As soon as she went down for a nap, I was back in bed for a nap of my own. I woke up to Lincoln telling me that lunch was ready...and it smelled delicious. I then discovered that he had washed the dishes, gone to the grocery store (& even sifted through my coupons & used a few), & made lunch for us, all while I took a 2-hour nap. We ate some more & laughed at the mac & cheese stuck on Kylee's nose & the way she rubbed it in her hair & made her hair stick up everywhere, and then we took pictures of it. Then I cleaned all of Kylee's toys while she played like an angel, and Linc studied for the MCAT in the other room.

We remembered to read scriptures together and then Lincoln & Kylee & I gave each other group hugs over & over, before we sent Linc out the door for work. When Kylee went down for another nap, I took a shower with a Sprouts bag on my head, because I couldn't find my shower cap & was too lazy to wash my hair. And while I was laughing at how funny it looked, I was thinking that it is funny how quickly things can turn around & that when I pay attention to my family and do things that invite the Spirit into my life, & when I don't worry so much about ALL of the things that I'm not doing right, that all of my other worries & insecurities just seem to disappear. I also realized that my hubby & baby make all the difference in my life. Their small (& big) acts of service are enough to keep me going indefinitely. (Kylee's acts of service are accidental for now, but her smiles & hugs & everything else are awesome!)

So what I'm trying to say in a very roundabout way is...
Here's to the little things in life that make a really big difference.

Medical School Plans

I've mentioned that we have some big plans for medical school. Well, we are ready to announce them to those of you who haven't already heard. We know that some of you will think that we are COMPLETELY CRAZY, but we understand. :) Lincoln is currently preparing his application to send to...
LA UNIVERSIDAD DE GUADALAJARA!

(Photo from Wikipedia)

Lincoln will take the MCAT on September 11th. He will be applying to start medical school in Guadalajara, Mexico in January 2011. Lincoln introduced this idea to me over a year ago, when his cousin was accepted to medical school there. The first time Lincoln mentioned it to me, I realized that moving to Mexico for 4 years was the LAST thing I wanted to do...but I have felt like this was the right thing for us from the beginning. These feelings have only gotten stronger this past year.

The idea of moving to another country where I don't know the language or the culture seems very intimidating. (I do know a little bit of Spanish, but I'm a lot better at reading & writing it than I am at speaking it. I can't even roll my R's!) Lincoln & I have been preparing our families for this for awhile now (although we just recently made the decision to apply this year instead of next year). When we met Kylee & her birth parents, we already knew that moving to Mexico was a huge possibility...so luckily we were able to tell them this, before they even chose to have us adopt Kylee. I'm happy about the fact that we will be able to take our dogs with us too! :)

We're not sure that Lincoln will even be accepted, but this is the only place we are applying this semester. We would appreciate any prayers offered on our behalf. The road to medical school has been a LONG one for us, mostly because of my health and the setbacks that caused us. I'm sure most of you are wondering how safe this is...Linc's cousin & his wife live in a gated community with a guard posted 24/7 and feel very safe there. They LOVE the people, the school, the weather, & so many other things about Guadalajara. If we get accepted, it will be SO nice to be there with them.

I'll update the blog as we get more info. For now, we are just trying to finish Lincoln's application. Then we will work on paperwork, passports, dogs' shots, etc. We have a LOT of work to do! Not to mention that Linc will be taking 3 science classes (PHY 112, BIO 202 & CHM 236) this next semester, as well as working full time! If Lincoln doesn't get accepted in January, we will apply again next fall. We're really hoping that with all of Lincoln's medical experience, we will get in on our first try!

Cabin Trip

My family's plans to go camping this past weekend fell through when we realized that it would be raining all weekend. With everyone having taken time off work, we knew that we had to find somewhere to go together. After calling multiple cabins, trying to find one that wasn't booked through the rest of the year (seriously), we decided to call Lincoln's grandparents on the off-chance that they would want 12 people coming to stay with them at their cabin for the weekend. To our delight, they said that we were welcome to come! We left on Friday morning & came back Sunday afternoon. It was the PERFECT getaway & was SO much fun. I really don't think this trip could have gone any better. With no injuries or disagreements, and lots of extra time and fun things to do all day, we all had a blast!!! :)

Here are just a few of the things we experienced this weekend:
PORCH SWING:

WIFFLE BALL:

GAMES:

S'MORES:

GRANDPARENTS:
FIRES:

BUGS:

PROBLEM SOLVING:

BOCCE BALL:

GREAT-GRANDPARENTS:
TRAFFIC:

TANTRUMS:

Not pictured:
-Playing "Would You Rather?"
(Example: "Would you rather get called as the gospel doctrine teacher or get stung by a bee in your nostril 20 times?")
-Playing frisbee golf in the rain
-My dad talking with Grandma Hiatt for hours on end
(She loved him for it!)
-Lincoln's mom getting up with Kylee every morning so that we could sleep in!

Kylee's 1st Bday

I wanted to post about Kylee on her birthday (which was last Wednesday), but had no idea what to say. How can I even put into words how much she means to me and what a difference she makes in my life?

Before Kylee became a member of our family, Lincoln & I felt like parenthood was so far out of our reach. The chances of me getting pregnant a second time weren't great. I had had 7 surgeries & was headed for more. Things looked bleak and I was discouraged.

And then Kylee came.

I will always remember the moment I found out that Kylee existed. I will always remember the feelings in my heart when I met her for the first time.

I will always remember the first night she slept in a bassinet by my bed.

I will always remember the joy in my family members' voices as I told them that we found our little girl.

I will always remember the way the feeling in our home changed when Kylee entered it.

I will always remember the love I felt for Heavenly Father because of the way that all of this was so perfectly orchestrated.

Happy 1st birthday to my miracle baby.