Sorry if I sound like a major complainer in this post, but these past 5 days have been pretty miserable. What was originally thought to be a bacterial infection in my throat is now a viral infection. The meds I was taking were making things worse, not better. Now I'm stopping the 3 medications I was on for this & am starting a new medicine that should help the inflammation somewhat. My throat looks nasty...I have big sores all over my tonsils.(TMI? Sorry.) The problem with a viral infection is that you just have to wait it out. Lincoln is gone for 13 hours tomorrow. Friday we are having our kitchen & downstairs bathroom torn out & redone. I'll be thankful when I feel better again!
This is the first time I've been really sick since recovering from my hysterectomy. It probably sounds crazy, but a flood of emotions & old habits have come back with this illness. Logically I know that it won't last long & that I have good reason to be in so much pain...but I feel like a "sick person" again. Isn't that strange? It definitely has surprised me, & has made me recognize & analyze the insecurities & thoughts that I am having.
It's kind of hard to admit, but I know that these lessons are just part of my journey toward healing emotionally from all that has happened with my health. I know that I just need more experiences with having a temporary physical setback (like everyone has) and being able to quickly overcome it. Being sick or in pain, going to the doctor, taking meds, and being told that things aren't going to get better anytime soon, is something that I became used to. I am so, so grateful to be such a healthy person now, and am excited to have more positive experiences with doctors & my body's new abilities, so that I can change my thoughts & feelings about those things.
So I'll start over with this new medication, wait this out (cheerfully, I hope!) and then get back to my healthy, full life! I was reminded once again of how well Lincoln takes care of me, and how much I love having Kylee & the dogs around to snuggle with when I'm not feeling well. Plus, I've realized that we already have a support system of such great friends here in Mexico, who seem to be constantly doing nice things for us. I'm truly incredibly blessed.
3 comments:
I hope that you start feeling better soon. I know what that means to feel those familiar emotions prior to the hysterectomy. I am STILL trying to get myself back to a "normal" state, whatever that may be. I hope that you are able to get your new kitchen and bathroom done very soon!
Anjane', I'm so sorry that you are so sick!! It is so hard when you were sick for so long and then you get sick again. love you so much and miss you a TON!!!
Oh man, I can't believe you have to wait this one out. Hopefully you won't have to wait to long. Thinking of you friend. Call me if you need anything.
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